Thursday, March 31, 2011

Cancer & Alcoholism

In the four years that I have been sober, I have known 3 people that have died and at least a half dozen more that have been diagnosed.  What is going on?  Is there a correlation between them?  Is it that we did so much damage to our bodies while we were drinking that it can no longer fight off the rampaging cancer cells?  Studies show that yes they are more than likely related.
I found this article on About.com, Alcohol and Cancer. "...considerable evidence suggests a connection between heavy alcohol consumption and increased risk for cancer, with an estimated 2 to 4 percent of all cancer cases thought to be caused either directly or indirectly by alcohol."  It goes on to say, "studies show that alcohol may affect cancer development at the genetic level by affecting oncogenes at the initiation and promotion stages of cancer.  It has been suggested that acetaldehyde, a product of acohol metabolism, impairs a cell's natural ability to repair its DNA, resulting in a greater likelihood that mutations causing cancer initiation will occur.  It has recently been suggested that alcohol exposure may result in overexpression of certan oncogenes in human cells and, thereby, trigger cancer promotion."

Not a very happy subject I know, but I just received news of a lovely lady in the program who was just diagnosed with stomach cancer and yet another last week who is so riddled with it, they aren't sure where it started.  I really am not sure how to feel about all of this...did I beat it?  Did I stop drinking in time?  I realize of course that I can not live in fear of "what if I get cancer?" because if I live in that kind of fear, I might as well be drunk because Goddess knows I won't be living anyway.  So I will keep doing what I am doing and pray for those who are sick and just be thankful that I am healthy today.
Blessings,
~T



Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Meet my family...

Family Portrait 2010

Jami (boyfriend), Me, Jaxon (son), Robert (brother), Sabrina (sister in-law), Kayl (son)
Victor (Jami's son), Mom, Step-dad and their dog Diesel

 To say that he likes fishing would be a slight under exageration!

Jami and his 10 foot Sturgeon

I just love their goofiness...such wonderful boys!

Jaxon and Kayl hanging with their cousins

Our Family Clown...such an innocent spirit.

Victor - fishing at the mouth of the Vedder

Halloweeeeeeen!!  My favourite time of year.

Mom (doctor) and stepdad (Elvis) and some pretty
wonderful ladies that work for mom.

Here comes the bride.....

Sabrina & Rob on their special day

Annnnd.....ME!!

heehee!


These are the most important people in my life and for whom I give thanks every single day.


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Satisfaction Guaranteed

So last night the boyfriend and I were being lazy on the couch after my dance class watching one of those house renovation shows… Holmes on Homes I believe it was.  The premise of the show is, he goes into houses of people that have basically been screwed by crooked contractors, and fixes it for them.  Now that is all nice and generous and all but really has nothing to do with this post.  My reason for posting this is…I love before and after results of almost anything, whether it is personal makeovers, house makeovers or the creation of something completely from scratch.  I find others creativity AMAZING.  And it got me to thinking about how satisfying it must be to go to work and look upon a completed project and say “hell ya…I did that and it is a damn fine job!” and then to see the smile on the customer’s face and their satisfaction.  I think I want that.  My job is so UNSATISFIYING and UNSTIMULATING, I cannot even begin to tell you for fear of putting you to sleep.
So my question is “what the heck am I going to do about it?”  Well I have started looking into school but will that career give me the SATISFACTION that I am looking for?  I am sure it will give me the STIMULATION as everyday will be unique to say the least, BUT...

**deep sigh** I have no clue what direction to take.  I am thinking it is time to look toward the heavens and ask the Goddess to guide me and show me the right path.  A sign?  A carrot?  Anything?  Pleeeeease???

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Dinner and a Movie and a Meeting and a...

I am ever so grateful for my life today, but I don't seem to recognize that as often as I should.  I am grateful for my children and for the fact that they actually came out for dinner and to a movie with Jami and I on Friday. I am grateful for Jami and that we were able to re-schedule our "just us" date for Saturday night. 

 I am grateful that my super little sponsee asked me to meet her at the Breakfast Meeting this morning and that we got to listen to some wonderful people share their experience strength and hope.  I am grateful that the sun is shining.  I am grateful for the energy treatment I received yesterday and for not waking up in pain today...it has been a LONG time.
I am grateful for the sunshine (did I say that already?) and the rain.  I am grateful for my parents and their kind loving souls.  I am grateful for ALL the love I have in my life...both giving and receiving. But I am mosting grateful for being SOBER because if I wasn't that, I wouldn't be grateful for anything. 

Blessings,
~T

Friday, March 25, 2011

HAPPY FRIDAY!!


Shhhh...don't tell anyone I am wasting time at work.  I just can't help myself!  It is Spring, the sun is shining, it's payday and it's FRIDAY

That makes me believe...


Have a very blessed weekend!
~A

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Absolutely Remarkable


I have been spending the last couple of days catching up on the lives of most of the blogs I used to follow...well still follow.  It is kind of cool reading though someone's blog...I mean like an entire month, year...whatever, seeing in a short time a story unfold.  The problem, the pain, the solution, the growth...truly amazing creatures we are.  I especially love the posts when someone has had an epiphany or "God shot" as many have called it.  The moment when they FINALLY get it and everything is OK.

The blog world really is not to unlike the AA fellowship...we have a certain bond and camaraderie.  We are here because we want to be heard and to hear others...to share and be part of someone elses sharing.  Thank you all for being here...and to those who convinced me to return (you know who you are), an extra special thank you to you.

Blessings,
~A

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Higher Learning

I am sat here tonight at my kitchen table, coffee in hand and laptop fired up trying to complete my application for school...yes that is right...I am, at the age of 38, going to go back to school.  Well at least I am going to try.  At this point it is all dependent upon financing - but isn't everything theses days?  My fear is that because I work full time and still have some student loan to pay from the last time I went back, that they may just tell me to get stuffed and laugh in my face.

What am I going to school for you ask?  My goal is to be certified with the Canadian Counselling Association and/or Canadian Addiction Counsellor Certification Federation.  Not a too lofty goal I don't think...it is certainly something I have been thinking about for a few years and I definately need a career change.  Then in light of a new health centre here...well it just seems that opportunity is presenting itself.

Blessings,
~A

Monday, March 21, 2011

Oestara


As I was leaving work late last week, I consciously noticed that it was still daylight and the air was somewhat warmer than it has been in recent weeks.  As I looked up to feel the sunshine on my face, I noticed something else that I hadn’t seen in about 12 months….THE CHERRY BLOSSOMS!!   Yes, the sure sign that spring is on its way!
The Spring Equinox, also known as Ostara comes from the Anglo-Saxon Goddess, Ostre.  Ostare is the Goddess of the East, Dawn, and the Spring. On this day, people celebrate the return of Spring, it is a time of birth and new life and it is when we renew our thoughts, dreams, and aspirations.
Easter, which falls on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the Spring Equinox, is the Christianized version of Ostara.  It is said that the Goddess Ostre had an enchanted hare that was able to lay eggs.  He would decorate his eggs and give them to the Goddess as offerings.  But one day Ostre became very upset with the hare and banished him to the heavens, which became the constellation Lepus that lies beneath the feet of Orion the hunter.

Ostara Blessings,
~A


Sunday, March 20, 2011

Four Years...One Day at A Time

This is my third attempt at writing my first entry on my new blog.  I had forgotten how difficult it can be sometimes to put your thoughts into words and then to put those words in some sort of coherent order for others to read...sheesh.

Well, let me start with telling you that I celebrated 4 years of sobriety on March 16th.  I was fortunate to share the meeting with someone from my home group who celebrated 30 years.  You know, it's not that I take pleasure in someone else's suffering but I sure do take solace in knowing that others have similar stories as mine and I am not alone.  And that someone with 30 years sobriety gets through the day the same way that I do.  It certainly was a special meeting.

~Goddess Bless!