Flash Fiction 55

Friday snuck up on me again and I didn't want to miss another one without submitting something so I pulled it out of the archives.  I wrote this one in 2009...you would have thought I wrote it yesterday in light of current events.  Perhaps it was me writing this and putting it out to the universe that it came to fruition!  Well I would like to think so anyway.  Enjoy your weekend!!

 “Marry me,” he said out of the blue. She stared at him, stunned. “What?” she said, “Are you crazy?” “Tomorrow, let’s get married tomorrow,” he said excitedly. “You ARE crazy!” she exclaimed. Her heart was racing, she wanted to say yes more than anything but was afraid, but didn’t know why. “Yes,” she said nervously.

If you would like to play along, just write your own piece of fiction in 55 words and let the G-Man know.

I Hear Wedding Bells!

Yes that is correct, Jami and I have set the date for June 30, 2012!  I remember a couple of years ago when we first starting seeing each other Steve E said to me, "hmmm perhaps I will be playing violin at your wedding one day".  Now although you are thousands of miles away Steveroni, your beautiful music will be in my heart that day.  YAY! I am sooo excited and he is such a wonderful man.  Well of course he is, cause I deserve it dammit! 

I just LOVE this cake!!

A Very Blessed Litha!

Summer has officially arrived and the Sun God has blessed us with his presence today!

Woman To Woman

Who would have thought that I would ever go to a women's retreat.  Some of you might remember telling you about the lady that had the garage sale and gave me the money to attend this retreat for women affected by alcohol.  Well it was this past weekend and although I went kicking and screaming, internally of course, I actually kind of enjoyed myself...sorta.  You see I really am not a social person, I like to be at home and mostly stick to myself and my family.  I get very uncomfortable at times in a room full of people I don't know and it was very difficult for me to attend.  Thank goodness for the small handful of women that were there from my area.  It was a weekend of meetings, meditation, yoga, good food and friendship.  It was kinda cool to watch new relationships develop...yes watch.  I tend to stick to the background and watch everyone.  I have always been like that, especially when I was drinking.  I was never one to be the centre of the party or really even a part of it.  I was most comfortable sitting on the sidelines just watching.  But, I can tell you, it sure is lonely on the sidelines.  I can almost guarantee that I would have enjoyed myself much more if I had participated a little.  Oh well, perhaps I will give it another shot next year.

Serendipity

I just love how the Goddess puts people in my path and I intuitively know that we have much more in common than being female.  We recently hired a young women and right from the moment I met her I knew that she was just like me.  I don't know what it was or why and it doesn't really matter.  All that matters is that I was able to share with her that I am in recovery and it went from there.  It was just a casual conversation, many of my co-workers know that I am a member AA so I don't hide it.  Later, after no one else was around, I could see that she almost had tears in her eyes as she said "those programs saved my life".  My heart was filled with joy and she asked if we could go to a meeting together sometime as she hasn't been in a very long time.  I get goosebumps when I think about it.  How we were brought together.  I just love this poem

A Reason, A Season, A Lifetime?

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong -doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But only for a season.LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant. Thank you for being a part of my life.

So even if we have been brought together for only a season, I know with out a doubt that it is for a greater reason than just a chance meeting.

Lunar Eclipse

Ahhhh...another full moon, isn't She beautiful!?  And this one with the added energy!  There will be a lunar eclipse tomorrow.  This is a rare one too.  This time the moon will pass directly through the shadow of the earth's shadow cone.  This hasn't happened in 11 years and won't happen again until 2018. Unfortunately it will not be visible where I am but it will be clearly visible over Africa, and Central Asia, visible rising over South America, western Africa, and Europe, and setting over eastern Asia. In western Asia, Australia and the Philippines – visible just before sunrise.  But certainly we can't deny that we are all affected by the energy of it, both mentally and neurologically and sometimes even spiritually.  For those of us that are not going to be able to view it, you can watch it at Astronomy Live or at  Bareket Oberservatroy Live Eclipse Broadcast. The time of the broadcast is...wait...with the time conversion is 10:02:24 Tuesday June 14, 2011 PST...hmmm, that's right now!!  I gotta go.  Enjoy!

Flash Fiction 55



Deviant Art

 Close your eyes and imagine!  What is it you see?  Does your mind conjure visions of pink elephants, cotton candy and carnival rides?  Or maybe something a little darker is more your style.   Yes, that is it.  Tell me.  Tell me of your nightmares, your fetishes, your dreams.  Perhaps we can make them come true…

Want to play?  Just write your own piece of fiction, non-fiction, poetry, etc and let the G-Man know.

Update...

Thank you all for your thoughts and ideas.  The website you suggested Scott is wonderful!  It has a parents section, a kids section and a teenager section.  If you have children I highly reccommend that you check out http://www.healthykids.org/ .

It has been two weeks since I found out about my son and he seems to be doing ok.  The doctor took him off of the Prozac because of some of the side affects he was having and we are going to try a more natural method of dealing with his depression.  But it seems that just us knowing what is going on has helped him a great deal.  Let's just hope he keeps on talking and not stuffing those toxic feelings.

As for the kids at school that are bullying him, he just wants to let it be as school is almost over and they will be moving onto the high school in the fall...I reluctantly agreed.

Flash Fiction 55

First I am having difficulties with Blogger, it isn't allowing me to comment on anyone's blogs or my own.  So thank you Margaret and Scott for your words of advice and the website.  It was truly helpful and I have saved it in my favourites.

This entry is the one I wrote last week after I found out about my son.

“Yes” he replied with tears in his eyes.  He rolled up his sleeve to expose his forearm.  Crimson coloured lines scared his pre-teen flesh.  His mom looked upon them in terror, her heart aching and her mind blaming herself.  “it’s ok honey.  We will get you some help.”  Tears rolled down her cheeks blinding her…

Wanna play?  Just write your own fiction, non-fiction, poetry, etc and let the G-Man know!

A Mother's Broken Heart

This past week has been, well let's just say heartbreaking.  I actually wrote last week's 55 about it but forgot to post it so stay tuned.  It certainly seems my 55 "fiction" really isn't so much fiction as what has been occuring as of late...but believe me I wish it wasn't.

In the last week I have found out that my 12 year old has been cutting himself.  Are any of you familiar with "cutters"?  When I found out, I felt my chest colapse and when he showed me his scars I almost fainted...seriously.  My heart broke into a million peices and all I wanted to do was hold him on my lap and rock him back and forth.  He is my baby...my ray of sunshine.  He is the one that saved my life when I was disappeared during the height (or low) of my drinking.  How could I have not known?!  How could I have not helped him?!  All the guilty thoughts raced through my head.  I told him that I am not going to pretend to understand why he cuts himself but I can only guess that it is for the same reasons as I drank and that was to cover the pain of something else.  Whether I planted that idea in his head or not, he agreed that that was the reason.  You see, he is a very fashionable boy.  You know the type...styled hair, skinny jeans...a trend setter really, and he is being bullied at school because of it.  They call him gay, faggot, the usual homophobic bullshit.  What bugs me the most is that I have always taught my kids tolerance...hell they even know that I have dated women...and that they should be true to themselves, and express themselves and be who and what they want to be.  So was I wrong?  Should I have stifled my son's desire to be unique and express himself?  Should I have encouraged him to conform and be just like everyone else?
Anyway, I took him to the doctor and of course, she wanted to put him on anti-depressants.  WTF!  He is 12!!  I calmly expressed my concern and suggested a more natural approach, but reluctantly let him make the decision.  Soooo....he has been on an extremely low dose of frickn' Prozac for a week now.  I don't think he is liking the side effects and of course he hasn't experienced the benefits yet as it takes a few weeks.  I can only hope that after he meets with the psychiatrist and has been on them a while that he will try my idea.  You know, it isn't depression that is the problem, the problem is the closed minded freakn' little monsters at his school.  And where did they learn that behaviour I wonder...hmmm...from their closed minded freakn' ignorant parents!! Ok...deep breath.
Then...oh yes..there is more...the other night, I found pot in his room.  I couldn't freakn' believe it!!  He said he had only been smoking it a little while (about a month) which is when he started cutting himself more often.  Yes more often, this has apparently been going on since he started middle school in September.  I am lost.  I really don't know what to do.  I have talked to my mom, my boyfriend, my sponsor and still I don't know what to do or how to make him ok.  My heart breaks every time I think about it.  However, I am grateful that I have found out when I did...before it was too late...you know what I mean?  Also, it almost seems that he is relieved that I know.  He has been talking to me a little more each day about what is going on and how he is feeling.  So that is a very very good thing because he has really been isolating and cutting himself off from the world (no pun whatsoever intended).  I miss my little boy so much I want to cry sometimes.  He will be 13 this month and is 4" taller than I am.  He is a young man who has made some poor decisions lately, but I don't love him any less.  I still want him to be who and what he wants to be.  I want him to express himself through his fashion, music, art...whatever he feels is right.  I told him last night...just be true to yourself.
I am not sure if any of this made sense and I didn't really intend on writing about it, but here it is...my broken heart, and his, for all to see.